Here is a pretty ante-nuptial perplexity picked up during my sojourn in the Old Dart, which is well worth presenting in puzzle form: “Now, Biddy darling,” said an Irish swain, “ye are so fond of tricks as well as Pat-tricks, I’d like you to riddle me wan that perplexes me entirely: Wanst, when a week ago last Tuesday was tomorrow, ye said: ‘When a day just two fortnights hence will be yesterday, let us get married, as ’twill be just this day nixt month.‘ Now, Biddy. I have waited just half that time, and ye have waited the same; so, as it Is now the 2d of the month. I suggest, if your heart goes ‘pittv-Pat,’ we might figure out when that wedding day is due.”
Regarding the problem of Biddy’s wedding day, it can be shown that the happy couple will celebrate their tenth anniversary on next St. Patrick’s Day. “When a week ago last Tuesday was to-morrow” it must have been Monday, Feb. 17, 1896, and when Biddy said, “When a day just two fortnights hence will be yesterday,” she was talking about St. Patrick’s Day, March 17, 1896, as no other day would fill the bill except 1868, in which case they would now be thinking of a golden celebration.
2.
Who was the most, successful financier mentioned in the Bible? Noah, because he floatd a limited company when all the rest of the world was in liquidation.
Why is a schoolmaster like the letter C? He forms lasses into classes.
Why is bread like the sun? Because it rises from the yeast.
When is a chair like a lady’s dress? When its sat-in.
When is a soldier like a watch? When he is on guard.
When does a chair dislike you? When it can't bear you.
Why is a duel quickly managed? Because it takes only two seconds to arrange it;.
If I were in the sun and you were out of it what would the sun become! Sin.
What disease are reapers subject to on hot days? A drop-sickle affection.
Why would an owl be offended at your calling him a pheasant? Because you would be making game of him.
Why is your nose in the middle of your face? Because it is the scenter.
When may two people be said to be half witted? When they have an understanding between them.
3. A RIDDLE.
An object for which many thousands do sigh,
A blessing I prove, or a curse;
And when to the alter of Hymen you hie,
You take me for better or worse.
I am of both sexes”both husband and wife,
You court me, you love me, you scout me;
I’m the source of much joy, contention and strife,
Yet few can be happy without me.
I travel by land”on the ocean I range,
With the fowls too, I soar in the air;
I’m constant. I’m fickle”too much given to change,
Therefore when you choose me”beware!
Ans. 13, 1, 20, 5.
MATE
4. A REBUS.
My first is a part of the day,
My last a conductor of light.
My whole to take measure of time,
Is useful by day and by night.
Cypher Ans. 8, 15, 21, 18, 7, 12, 1, 19, 19.
HOURGLASS
5.
What burns to keep a secret? Sealing-wax.
Why is a nobleman like a book? Because he has a title.
What class of women are most apt to give tone to society? The belles.
What is that by losing an eye has nothing left but a nose? A noise.
Why is a four-quart jar like a lady’s side-saddle? Because it holds a gal-on (gallon).
Why are balloons in the air like vagrants? Because they have no visible means of support.
Why is a very amusing man like a bad shot? Because he keeps the game alive.
Which is the favorite word with women? The last one.
6. CONCEALED GEOGRAPHY.
102. The servant, Anna, polishes the plate.
103. Fear lest, you aim too low.
104. Is Theodore gone already? (Territory.)
105. The power of riches terminates at a certain point
106. A coon climbed up an upas tree.
107. On the river Volga there lived a man who was scorched by the Sirocco.
108. A peculiar aroma in every part of this piazza is observed in the evening. (State.)
109. I have a rough ague.
110. Ask me any question you like, but I can’t, answer.
111. Prince Giglio left his love and Bulbo’s to Nelly Bly.
112. In my room a harness hangs.
113. Will Robert Douglas go west if I smile sweetly on the Earl?
114. If you put a hat upon a shovel the toads will wink. (Territory.)
115. A woman called Miranda named her dog Victoria.
116. In rescuing the soldiers, he found the last one hampered by the baggage.
117. I like no liquor so well as Triate Sherry.
118. A woman dressed “a la mode” nature would never recognize.
119. Let the glorious King Philip arm a fleet instantly.
120. Having broken my right arm I landed without effecting my purpose.
121. A red-fringed Stanhope rug I anticipate by the next steamer.
122. Here, girls,”Mag, Deb,” urge on the cows.
123. I never could fancy Prussic acid. (Island.)
124. The magnanimous hero bleeds for his country.
125. In scanning, the Pyrrhic and Iambus are seldom used (Island.)
126. An apple without a core, a pig would not reject.
127. A negro from Congo, Shenstone immortalized in his poetry.
128. A filigree ceinture adorned her lovely waist. (Country.)
129. An over-ripe cucumber never is fit for the a bite.
130. Gerzom was a huge or giant creature of antiquity. (State.)
131. O Catapult! O vast and mighty engine!
132. Let us form, a convention to ameliorate the condition of the Chinese.
102. Annapolis, 103. Arles, 104. Oregon, 105. Chester, 106. Pan, 107. Gath, 103. Maine, 109. Hague, 110. Utica, 111. Boston, 112. Omaha, 113. Glasgow, 114. Utah, 115. Dan, 116. Stoneham, 117. Syria, 119. Parma, 120. Milan, 121. Perugia, 122. Magdeburge, 123. Cyprus, 124. Leeds, 125. Candia, 126. Corea, 127. Goshen, 128. Greece, 129. Berne, 130. Georgia, 131. Pultora, 132. Macon.
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